Younovo InJoy Education. What You Should Know Before Applying.

This is all based on my own personal experiences so far.  Experiences may vary from person to person. (http://www.injoyedu.com/)

What follows is what I think recruiters should (but likely won't) tell foreign teachers during the video interview before hiring them.  So what will they tell you?  They'll tell you whatever they think it is that you want to hear to get you to sign-up with this company as quickly as possible - particularly if you're a native speaker, because from what I've heard recruiters get a nice big fat bonus in their paycheck for hiring native English speakers (although I have no way of knowing whether or not that's true - it's just what I've heard).

When you first arrive you’ll be picked up at the airport by your recruiter and be taken to a  two-star hotel (https://youtu.be/db-7NZsTEFk - Maybe not this exact hotel, but one similar.) nearby the office. You’ll spend about two weeks in the hotel, but because space is limited and new foreigners are always coming, after that two weeks you’ll be moved into an apartment with at least one other foreigner.  It’s possible but very unlikely that you’ll get an apartment to yourself.

As for work, you’ll spend about the first two weeks sitting in a small training room watching videos.  

There are three types of videos:

1.      Other teachers’ demo lessons.

2.      Other teachers teaching actual classes.

3.      Children’s songs. 

Time spent in the training room is unpaid and the first two weeks are obligatory.  If after two weeks they still haven’t found you a full-time job, you will only have to come to the office as required (for example, if you need access to their printing facilities or something like that).  In this time they will do their best to find you some substitution or part-time work.  Keep trying.  You will get a full-time job eventually (most likely at a kindergarten or a training centre).  Note that in some cases it may take a few months before receiving full-time employment.

After a few days you’ll be asked to make a short demo lesson to present in front of some of the InJoy staff (and other foreigners that may also be present), after which you will receive some feedback.  Please adjust your demo according to the feedback and try again later.

Once the staff are satisfied with your demo you will be taken to a school (most likely a kindergarten or a training centre) where you will deliver the demo again.  Depending on the school, you may deliver the demo only in front of school staff, or perhaps in front of a small class of students.  There will be a short interview with the staff either before or after giving the demo.  If you get the job you will be informed within a few days.  Unsuccessful applicants will not be informed and will have to continue at the office as usual.  Keep trying.  You will get a job eventually (most likely at a kindergarten or a training centre).  If you are offered a job that does not align with your preferences you have the right to decline, however it's strongly recommended that you take the job anyway, otherwise it might be several weeks – possibly months – before finding you another job, which would be detrimental to your finances.  The sooner you accept a full-time position, the sooner you can start being paid a full-time salary.

While it’s true that they have everything from kindergarten to university available, please keep in mind that you’ll most likely be matched to either a kindergarten or a training centre because they are privately owned, looking for new teachers year-round, and generally don't have holidays, which means in many cases you'll get paid year-round, unlike public schools which have both winter and summer holidays (Younovo InJoy Education pay by the hour, calculated to the exact minute and not a penny more, which means if you don't work, you won't get paid).  To increase your chances of being matched to public schools such as high-schools or universities you should arrive either just before February or just before September, because once session has started it will be much harder to match you to a public school.  But again, you'll most likely be matched to a kindergarten or a training centre.

Kindergarten's here in China generally teach from ages 3 to 9, with training schools teaching up to ages 16, and may also have private classes for adults.  Class sizes vary from anywhere between 4 and 20 students (and in some cases maybe even 30), whereas public schools can potentially have class sizes up to 80.  No that's not a typo, and yes you read that correctly - eighty.

Why I Love NETFLIX (incl. Amazon affiliate link)

What Business Insider tells us about Netflixis that:  

"In 2010, Netflix had 530 TV shows and 6,755 movies, according to Flixable. Today, the number of TV shows has nearly tripled, to 1,569, and the number of moviesoffered has decreased to 4,010. It's no secret that Netflix has focused more on TVshows and less on movies in recent years."

Some of the best TV shows and movies I've seen on here in recent years such The Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance (prequel to the cult classic The Dark Crystal (Blu-ray) (also available on Netflix), and I AM MOTHER are an excellent way to be entertained, regardless of your age or lifestyle.

Amazon affiliate links:
  

Leia was not "flying through space like Superman". Star Wars Episode VIII The Last Jedi

Firstly, it's not hard to imagine that in the amount time that's passed between Episode VI and Episode VIII that Luke has trained his sister in the ways of the Jedi, so when we say "Leia was flying through space like Superman" we're just being ignorant. Ignorant of two things:
1) How space works. 2) How The Force works. Now I'm no expert on either of these but I can tell you right now that Leia was not "flying through space like Superman". She was in space and was therefore 'weightless' and simply used The Force to pull herself back to the ship. It's no different to force-pulling a lightsaber out of the snow, but the ligthsaber is a lot lighter, so it goes towards the Jedi rather than vice-verca. Now you may have started wondering something like "Well then why didn't Yoda get pulled towards the X-Wing when he pulled it out of the swamp in Episode V?" (or possibly not because you may not have the level of spatial-awareness* required to make that kind of a leap. I don't know you, so I have no idea, I'm just hypothesising) A) Because he wasn't in the weightlessness of space like Leia was. B) Because it wasn't his will to go towards the X-Wing, but to have the X-Wing levitated out of the swamp. "The Force" is not as hard to understand as people are making it out to be. It's not just "Telekinesis and mind tricks", it's will power on a very massive scale with immediate results. That's all. Nothing more mystical than that. ===== *The ability to understand what two or more objects, concepts, scenarios or themes are and how the relate to each other. A person can, as is my understanding, improve their level of spatial-awareness (aka spatial-reasoning) by practicing solving logic puzzles (whether in real-life or in video-games), or by learning a musical instrument, with the piano being the one that will increase it in the least amount of time in comparison to the amount of time it will be increased learning other instruments.

Epic Long River Walk

Teaching in China, 2016. Day One - My Arrival.

I landed, waited for my luggage, - although because of what happened last time, I waited somewhat apprehensively - and went on my way, hoping to see someone by the name of Yolanda waiting for me with a sign.

I walked out, and I see two Chinese ladies and they ask me "Lan Hollis?", and I'm like "Huh?"
"Lan!" and I'm like "You're Yolanda?" and she showed me the sign she'd written "Lan Hollis", and I'm like, uh no, "Ian Hollis" (The error here comes from the font used in the Chinese messaging service WeChat being sans-serif, which makes the upper case 'I' and the lower case 'l' look identical.  But why they think I'd write my first name entirely in lowercase, and only my second name beginning with a capital is entirely beyond me.

She was there with her friend Tina, another staff member from the school where I'd be working, because Tina can drive and Yolanda can't.

We drove from Ningbo airport to Fenghua - about an hour, maybe 90 minute drive - and I was hoping to be able to go straight to my apartment, unload my stuff, (like, just put my bag in the room), and then get on with things; However, this was not to be the case.  Yolanda and Tina were rather insistent that I set up a bank account, even though I already had one.  Anyway, it turns out I needed to set up a new one, anyway, because my old one was from Hunan, and I am currently in Zhejiang, and if I'd continued with the one from Hunan, it would have cost me a small fee any time I wanted to anything, so I began setting up a new bank account, only to be told that I couldn't without a telephone number, so off to China Mobile me went and got me a sim-card with a local Chinese phone number.  I chose a number from the list, which was apparently taken, then chose another which is now mine.  We went back to the bank - a slightly different, closer to the school where I work, bank - and continued setting up my bank account, where I deposited a small amount of money I'd had with me since my time in Australia where I exchanged some Australian money for some Chinese in the Sydney International (Charles Kingsford Smith) Airport.

After it had all been said and done, we went to lunch on the fourth floor - the 'theme restaurants' level - of the shopping centre which is part of the same building complex as my apartment.  Tina had ordered me a peppered beef steak - I think that's what it was, anyway.  Anyway, we ate our meals, talked with each other about ordinary things - what it was like for me before, what was going to happen this time around, and so on ... after which I was taken back to my apartment on the eighth floor, where I could, after having been awake for more than twelve hours straight, finally catch some rest.

Teaching in China 2016 - Monkey on a Plane.

The person whom I sat next to on the flight from Sydney to Guangzhou was clearly not an experienced flier - constantly fidgeting, sometimes complaining to the crew and, well, given her age, it can be forgiven that she didn't seem to know how to use the touch screen panel in front of her; However, that fact that she didn't know how to use it amplified how fidgety she was.  This is all in economy class, by the way, so her her constant fidgeting meant me constantly being elbowed in my right hand side.  When the time came that she wanted to recline, she tried to lift the arm rest between the two chairs, and slamming her back into the chair.  It was at the point my image of her was of a "Monkey on a Plane" (even though it's not a particularly nice thing to say about someone).  This all went on for NINE HOURS AND FORTY MINUTES!!!  Do you know how long that is!?  It's just over seventy-five percent (75%) of HALF A DAY!!!  When the plane eventually landed, the nightmare was finally over just got worse, as just after the plane had landed - and I mean literally just after the plane had landed ... the very second after the plane was 100% on the ground - she started gesturing up towards the luggage compartment, obviously asking me to get her baggage down.  There were announcements in both Chinese and English requesting passengers stay in their seats until the plane had come to a complete stop, and the seat-belt light had gone off.  Yet, she constantly kept pointing to the overhead baggage hold and asking me to get her luggage.  For fuck sake, woman, learn to have some fucking patience and stop acting like you think getting your luggage down first is somehow more important than that of every other passenger on the plane. !@#$%^&*()!!!!!

In case you're wondering, after the plane eventually did come to a complete stop, and the seat-belt light did go out, yes, I did actually get her luggage down for her ... she was only a little monkey, after all.  ;-p

Teaching in China - How I Met My Roommate (in Feb 2015).

I walked into my assigned hotel room, and noticed I was the first there.  Was it that I was lucky to get a room to myself?  Probably not.  We'd been told there were still a few on their way.

Two beds to choose from, so I take the one near the window, taking note of what my sister often says about people being less likely to take your seat if you leave your personal belongs there.  So I put my hat down, put some loose change and my sunglasses in it, and my bag on a chair by the table ... or on the bedside table ... I forget exactly which it was.  Anyway.  I made sure that I 'claimed' that bed as I my own, and whomever my room mate turned out to be knew it as soon as they walked it. (turns out when he first walked in (I was out with some other interns at the time) he wasn't sure if it was mine, or the cleaners just neglected to pick up the previous person's things (something like that, anyway).

Anyway, I've come back from a small night out, getting to know some of the other inters (most of them British, one South-African) and I see some luggage parked in the bedroom (keep in mind, my luggage is still in transit at this point - please read my previous entry for more information about that) and I wonder if the luggage is mine (the lights are off and I was gonna go straight to bed, anyway). The large luggage looks like mine, but seems to be the wrong colour.  I see the other bed is occupied and figure he probably just wants to sleep.  I go to bed and figure I'll worry about my luggage in the morning.

The next morning I get up and my roommate's alarm goes off, so I get up as well and we get talking and get along well.  We get ready and go to have breakfast with the other interns.

Turns out he's a legit teacher from the U.S. and even has some well-respected Japanese citizens as his students and even tells me the story of how he ended up being their teacher.

What can I say but to quote the immortal words of Darth Vader? "Impressive ... Most impressive." ... and plus I just wanted to shoehorn in a Star Wars reference.

Anyway ~

Teaching in China - Relinquishing My Luggage (temporarily)

NOTE: The level of English at Beijing International Airport is embarrassingly sub-par for an international airport.

The plane had landed and I wandered off the plane in a daze along with all the other passengers.  The Beijing international airport is less than ordinary. It's boring and dull and not a clock in sight.

I finally reach the part of the airport where the customs officers stamp you in, and I add myself to the end of one of the queues (that all ultimately lead to the same place).

I see to main officers, a cranky man, and a pleasant looking young girl.  I pray to God I get the girl, and thankfully she calls me over while Mr. Cranky Pants is still having some trouble with some other folk.

She looks at my passport, seems pleased, stamps it and I move on.

I wait for my luggage ... and wait ... and wait ... and wait ... I go to another belt and wait.  I'm harassed by some young luggage worker asking for money to help me find my bags.  I just tell him I don't have any money and show him my empty wallet and he leaves.

I ask someone about my luggage, and eventually get pointed to lost and found, where they track the number on my luggage, and tells me while it's on the right flight (Hong Kong to Beijing) with the right airline, it's on the wrong plane - the one after the one I was one.

I leave my details and the address of the hotel I'd be staying at for the next week with them, and they say my luggage should be here in around three hours, and I could wait if I wished.  I decide not to, and go and meet the people from ImmerQi that are waiting for me at the airport StarBucks (along with a few other interns).

I explain my situation, and again am asked if I'd like to wait, or move on to the hotel when the time arrives, so I decide to move on to the hotel.  When there, I inform the ImmerQi staff of my situation and given them the details the airport's lost and found gave me and they say they'll take it over from there and inform me when my luggage arrives.

Around twenty-four hours later, I'm notified of my luggage's arrival, and am called to the hotel lobby to come and collect it.  You can't believe that amount of relief I felt at that time!

Teaching in China - Learn Before You Land.

Part of what I was looking forward to when I went to China was weekly two hour lessons, provided by the school - lessons which the school was contractually obligated to provided, might I ad.

How awesome would it have been to order your favourite meal from KFC, or have a chat with a street vendor, or asking something of a store clerk in conversational Chinese?  Or be able to ask directions if you got lost.  You get the idea.

Anyway, I'm sad to say those lessons almost never came, and when they were offered it was nothing more than the school offering us students to teach us.  The few lessons that did come were from students whose English wasn't good enough to understand what we were asking.

So my suggestion to you, if you're ever either foolish enough or brave enough to take on such a venture as teaching English in China with few qualifications, and literally no practical teaching experience, I highly, highly recommend you learn as much of the language as you can before you leave.

I knew I was heading to China with more than enough to time to learn some of the language, but I was so stressed by the whole situation (and what other things were going on in my life at the time) that I wasn't thinking clearly enough to just learn something.  Anything.

Anyway, below are three titles you can check out for learning Chinese, if it's something you're interested in.

I'm personally a big fan of the Pimsleur method of language learning myself.

Enjoy.

- Ian.

              

Teaching in China - Don't Drink the Tap Water.

Excuse the inappropriateness of the following comment, but ...
Do you know what it's like to have diarrhoea almost every day of your life for three months, straight?

I do!  And all because of having lived in China.

In China, if you want to drink tap water you MUST boil it in a jug first (even if it's just for brushing your teeth), and I did, but believe me, going to the corner store and buying bottle water was by far the more sensible choice.

The particular area where I was sent in China is famous for its love of spicy foods - something that I personally hate (again, another reason to do your research and not put 'no preference' on your application form).

The school was ... school food, if you get my drift, and yes, it was provided for free, but ... ugh!  Chicken legs?  No thank you.  Spicy tofu and carrot shavings?  Well ... certainly not as bad as chicken legs, but still ~

So Daniel and I often frequented the nearby KFC, having little more than chips and a drink.

We did eventually find a family restaurant "BOB Bar and Restaurant" or something like that, which served small pizzas ... spicy pizzas. -.-;  Can you imagine a spicy Hawaiian Pizza?  Having experienced one first hand myself, I don't have to imagine it.  Although all in all, it was actually quite tasty.

On our last day there, the head English teacher shouted us to a goodbye lunch at the family restaurant, and I ordered a fruit pizza, thankfully not spicy - not that I remember, anyway - and I honestly couldn't believe how delicious it was.

Believe me, there are probably few who can appreciate just what it is to have a normal *ahem* movement ~

There was nothing better than coming home and having a locally made, juicy all-Australian hamburger, beetroot and all!

Whew.

- Ian.

P.S. Again, sorry about the inappropriateness of some of this post.

Did I Tell You About That One Time I Made a Video Game?

This is going back quite some time before I went to China, or even had a TEFL/TESOL certificate.

As someone who's been playing video games since I was three - yes, three - years old, making a game is something I've long since wanted to do.

It's something I've talked about both casually and seriously with my friends and family and my friends often wondering how long it would take before I actually got around to it, procrastinator that I am.

Anyway, I think it was sometime in 2014 when I made a game I initially called "Touch My Balls". You can imagine most people's reaction to that title.

After some fine-tuning and mostly cosmetic changes (which was no easy feat), I changed the name to what it is today "Ball Popper" and uploaded it at http://www.ballpopper.me/ where you can find it today.

I've tried and tried to compress it down to an app to release on the android store (I'd probably sell it for $0.99) and yet I would receive error after error, and eventually just gave up.

Making a game was something I enjoyed, but ugh, it was just such a tedious task, and it didn't help that I'm not the most mathematically minded person in the world.  I had to keep asking my friend who works in I.T a better way to go about the lines of some code and if not for him, I probably would've given up on the game long ago.

Like me, he doesn't seem particularly interested in pursing the refinement of this game, and it's likely it's going to be left like it is for quite a long time, if not forever.

Anyway, please do try it out and share it with your friends.  Even if you don't like it, please share it with your friends anyway.

Again, the address is: 

http://www.ballpopper.me/

- Ian.

Teaching in China - Getting Overpaid (although not by much).

Being interns we were paid at a rate of $500AUD (give or take, depending on conversion rate), and were told if we stayed on (which I didn't), we would be paid at a teacher rate, which I think worked out to about double, so $1,000AUD.

Daniel and I were paid half cash-in-hand, and half directly into our bank accounts.

After the second payment Daniel brought it up with me that he thought we were being overpaid, and because the school was giving us the same amount in cash that the placement partner was giving us into our bank account, it ended up that we were being overpaid by around $100AUD/month, making a total of $600AUD/month.

We kept our mouths shut, and I partly wondered if it was intentional to make-up for not being at the school as long as other interns around the country, and that would bring us up to the same level of pay as them, but Daniel did the maths, and we still came off short.  I double checked with my own maths (not that maths was a strong point of either myself or Daniel), and yep, after all was said and done, we'd still come off short.

As part of the package, when you finish your teacher, you're paid a bonus pack (which I believe is equal to one months pay + a bit extra) and Daniel was utterly livid when he realised after our usual pay date for our last month, we hadn't been paid for it or received our bonus money.

He contacted our liaison for the company and filled him in on the situation, the confusion being that the company paid the school, expecting the school to pay us that lost lot of money entirely in cash, and the school not realising.

Anyway, after it was all sorted, we not only got our final months pay plus our bonus, but a little extra on top 'for our troubles' (of having to sort out the clerical error and who owed us what).

When the head teach came to pay us, he separated the pile of money in roughly the middle, and handed half to me and half to Daniel, insisting that we count it there and then.  He was pleasantly surprised with himself when he realised he'd split it exactly in the middle and given us both the exact correct amounts.

~*~*~*~

I've since spoken to at least one of the other interns, and he said be broke-even with the pay he got in regards to the cost of the TEFL course, the various administration fees he had to pay to do the internship and his flights.

While I did come home with some money to my name, I definitely didn't break even by any stretch of the imagination.

Be bold, brave, daring and adventurous.

That is all, thank you very much, good day.

- Ian.

Teaching in China - The "No Preference" Mistake.

When I applied for my job in China, three of the questions were:

Where would you like to teach?
What age group?
What English level?

which to all three I made the mistake of answering 'no preference'.

I left my fate in the hands of God/The Universe/Whatever you want to call it and if there was ever a mistake to be made, that was it.

I got sent to Xiangnan Experimental Middle School in the middle of bum-fuck nowhere; a low socio-economic region in the Hunan province in the south of China.

The children were poorly (and I mean poorly) behaved, some students had better English than some assistant teachers (and that's not saying much), and Daniel (the other foreigner with whom I was placed at the school) and I were never told anything about when tests/assemblies were held.

If you watch this video:

"From the School to the Bridge and Back Again"

You'll get a general idea of what the area is like (and hopefully, why not to go there).

If you've never been to China before, stay calm and just do some research - do a lot of research.
Do as much research as humanly possible. I didn't, and it was a mistake.

Research into where the best places to teach in China are, which work places will treat you with respect, where the best cities are, and so on.

In hindsight I would've probably made the following choices:
Shanghai.
Teenagers.
Upper Intermediate.

Although at the same time, after having taught at a middle school (ages 11 - 16, roughly), I actually don't mind teaching pre-teens so much.

The company that sent me there, ImmerQi, no longer send interns to that location (as is my understanding).

So in short, know yourself well enough to know in what type of a place you'd like to live while there, what age group you'd like to teach (I'd never taught before in my life, so I didn't really know) and what level of English you'd like your students to have.


Be bold.  Be brave.  Be adventurous.

That is all, thank you very much, good day.

- Ian.

One of my classes in China.

Teaching in China - What a Crazy Dream I Had.

Before I get to the dream, let me just firstly say that I've been at my placement school for a week now, and a a part of me had been regretting the decision to choose 'No Preference' for where I was placed in China, what age group I taught, and the English level of the learners I would teach.  I'd even contemplated being asked to be moved to a different school.  Facebook friends have all told me just to 'hang in there', which I'm trying my best to do, but after I laid on the couch in my room early this afternoon, I had a dream that made me realise...

Sometimes it takes the most vivid dreams in our deepest sleep to show us just how much it is that we need to 'wake up'....

I was looking at the piece of paper which had my placement on it and noticed that it had two, the first being a shorter stay than the second, so I went along with all the other TEFL interns who were leaving the day that my shorter placement had finished, and we all got onto to some weird crazy suspended bunk beds.  Where are we? I wondered to myself.  Are we on modified shipping containers to be shipped out around China? Then, a familiar type of shunting feeling - we were on a train.  We were at the very back, and looked out the large window as we watched the town disappear in the distance.

My mum started talking to her sister (my auntie) and my (deceased) cousin, Stuart, about her placement - Wait.  What's Mum doing here? She always said she'd 'wring their little necks' if she ever became a teacher.  And yet there she was, quite calmly talking about where she was going to be placed and that she hadn't yet started.  She also mentioned that Joanne, my sister, had willingly missed the train, and she had some washing to hang out. What? I was then struck with an image of my sister hanging out some washing on a windy day.  How strange.

As I listened to my mum talk, I started to realise something - I'd read my placement sheet wrong and wasn't supposed to be on that train at all.  Is it a one-way trip, or will there be stops where I can get off and go back? The train made a few stops and I panicked more and more with each passing stop, desperately trying to talk myself into getting off the train and go back when I suddenly burst into tears.  "I miss those kids, I really miss them" I say in a panicked blubber.  "I don't actually like most of them, but there's a few really good kids there that I'm really going to miss.  I have to go back, I just have to!"

I woke up suddenly, slightly shocked and ultimately relieved that it was nothing more than a dream; a dream I contemplated the deeper meaning of after having awoken from it, as I do now typing this, coming to the conclusion that it is trying to tell me one thing above all else: "Wake up to yourself, Ian.  Wake up." (Or, you know, something along those lines, anyway). ;-)

What do you think?

- End.

Those Stairs We Climbed. (My morning at The Great Wall of China).

What words must I put?  What words must I say?  Is it not impossible to convey the truth of my experience using only these limited things we call 'words'?  And yet, I must try.

It begins - a tired morning in a mediocre hotel, slowly rushing to get ready to make it to breakfast to socialise with the others.  Who is it I have yet to meet?

I sit at one of the round tables, as I remember it, with my roommate and some others.  Two physics teachers - a couple - recommend me to the film "Interstellar", as do others at the table who've seen it, and I wonder to myself if it and I shall get along well.

Once breakfast has passed, we make our way, in the manner of a slow, un-urgent rush, to the hotel lobby.

Our attention received, we make our way to the boarding of one of two buses.  I, my roommate, some friends and acquaintances board bus 1, the others, bus 8.  With few seats left I sit next to Sam, whom I originally met at Starbucks in the Beijing International Airport on the day I landed.

We see the wall as the bus approaches, which I found initially unimpressive, but as the bus traveled further, the sheer and utter scope of the wall started to dawn on me.  An impressive architectural feat of humanity if ever there was one.

The group is organised, the climb begins.  So excited, so enthused to be climbing  The Great Wall of China! Climbing ... climbing ... ... climbing ... Dear God, what have I gotten myself into? O_O  I struggle to keep up with the group, as my legs start to ache and my heart starts to pound.  I push myself to continue, barely managing to keep my position in the group. I find a spot to rest and notice blood feels like crimson sandpaper flowing through every fiber of my being, especially in my chest.  It's my heart.  Is it palpitating?  I'm not sure, as I'm too overwhelmingly exhausted to tell.  Thinking I'd lagged so far behind that I was last in the group, I'm surprised when others I know start to pass me.  Those from Bus 8, no doubt.  I'm unquestionably the last in my own group.  More pass, and one stops to ask if I'm okay.  I explain my palpitations, and am told, as much as I desire it and tell myself I can, not to push myself.  "Do I look pale to you?  Paler than usual, I mean," I ask.  "You've got colour in your cheeks."  I think to myself It might be okay. I heed her advice and decide to pace myself.   From now on, I dawdle, taking slight rests at every opportunity, other people from the second group passing me every now and again.

Onward I continue, people now coming back down and I ask them which tower is the top, pointing to the which seems to be the highest from my perspective.  "Nah, not that one, man, the next one," he replies.

Eventually, I climb to the souvenir shop and buy myself a t-shirt, a jumper, and a brand new, long overdue, cap.  I carry onward, knowing that there's not much more to go, knowing that I'd regret it for the rest of my life were I to give up now ... or ever.

Nearing the highest tower, I hear a voice call out my name "Ian!!!".  I look up and see my friend leaning over from the top of the tower, smiling and waving, seemingly happy that I'd made it all the way.  I'm overcome with relief. That voice from on high giving me that last burst of encouragement I need to take those final few steps and make it to the top of the tower.

I'm done.  I've done it.  I'm here.  I'm here right now standing on top of the world.  I made it.

And then I went back down, stopping once again at the souvenir shop, buying myself a medal as proof that I'd achieved the impossible.

And on that day, the day of Our Lord, I had conquered not only the wall, but myself.

Yours,

Ian Hollis, English Language Teacher.

BUTT IN MY EYE.

Very nearly, anyway!

Firstly, it should be known that within the confines of the courtyard in the place that I live, smoking is prohibited, and secondly, that smoking is allowed on balconies.  However, some apartments' balconies, open into the courtyard.

The other night as I walked out I noticed two European girls smoking on said balcony and as I walked under the balcony, minding my own business, what should I see fall merely inches in front of my face but a carelessly discarded cigarette butt.  One that could have, had my timing have been any different, very easily landed on my head, clothes, or, worst case scenario, in my eye.  Luckily it was none of those.

I have since sent a complaint to the UNSW Housing commission, the outcome of which is that the girls have received a 'formal warning' about their actions (or so said the email reply).

Hopefully a 'formal warning' is enough to have them consider their actions, and no longer smoke where they shouldn't (or at the very least, no longer carelessly discard cigarette butts into a place where they know not what damage they could potentially do).

If I catch them doing it again, I will simply complain further until noticeable action has been taken (because I'm like that).

- Ian.

CAMPUS DRINKS CHEAP.

If you go to UNSW, you'll find drinks no cheaper than at the on-campus Regency Chemist.  Last semester, the owner of the chemist asked all customers to sign a petition to allow him to keep selling drinks and goodies, as the powers-that-be of the university were threatening to prevent him from being able to do that, simply because he's out-competing the (the quite frankly, overpriced) on-campus, university run stores.

To me, it speaks volumes about what kind of a university this is that it is attempting to bully out their competition, rather than, as any good practitioners of business would do, compete with them.

In school, in business, in life, bullying tactics are not acceptable under any circumstances.

- Ian.

Semester 2, 2012.

If I don't pass at least two of the three subjects in which I'm currently enrolled, then this is my last semester at UNSW, and I'll be expelled.

Creative Writing I love, and if I do manage to pass both Creative Writing and Education, (or even Linguistics), I will change my degree completely to Creative Writing.

I got my first test for this semester back on Monday, and I got 28/70 (40%) for a Linguistics test.  It's not that I'm not smart enough to pass the test, it's just that I couldn't be fucked studying for it - I hate studying; I always have, and I always will.

In the mean-time, I'm looking for a job.  Hopefully I'll get something.

- Ian.

Living on Campus.

After all these years, I'm finally living on campus, with four housemates, all of which are Chinese.  There's two girls, both named Lin, and two males, Gordon, and Ray.

I get a long with C. Lin and Gordon the best, and Ray and X. Lin seem to get along the best of my Chinese house mates.

The apartment is self catered, meaning you have to cook for yourself, etc, and costs $205/wk, and there are on-site laundries, which cost $1.20 for washing and another $1.20 for drying (but I've noticed my housemates just bring the clothes in and hang them on a dryer, rather than paying to have them dried).

Mostly I don't see the other housemates, as I'm more often out of the house than in it, and use it only for meal times, if that, and somewhere to sleep - mostly I'm in the Main Library, because here I can get free internet.  If I want internet in my room, it costs me $2/GB and that's a complete rip off!

Anyway, break week this week, so should probably get started on my essay for Education, then we come back next week (second week of September) for Week 8 (and I have a presentation in Week 10).

Anyway, I guess that's all I've got to say for now.

See you later.  ^_^